Inter-Generational Christian Community

Not the most exciting blog title, I know. "Inter-Generational Christian Community." But here is the point: Our current community group is the most diverse I've ever been part of. And I haven't known how to maximize the strength of our diversity. 

Let's face it. For most us, we spend our community discipleship existence in age-divided silos. Elementary age children are with kids of the same ages or grades. Middle and high school years are full of small groups of other awkward, raging-hormone-afflicted teenagers. College is accompanied for many by parachurch ministries like Young Life, Campus Crusade, or similar others. And for the first 11 years of our marriage, Natalie and I have been in or led small groups -- what we call Community Groups at Origins -- of mostly people in their 20s and early 30s. Birds of a feather...

And its great because everyone is basically dealing with the same stuff as those they are "sharing life" with. In elementary school its about obeying parents and not being a bully as we are taught to trust Jesus. In middle and high school its about having a quiet time each day and avoiding the perils of sex, drugs, and rock n' roll as we are taught to trust Jesus. In college its about choosing the right major, career, and mate as we are taught to trust Jesus. And then in our young adult lives its about charting the course of our lives and being more "cool" as parents or as a couple than our parents were...as we are taught to trust Jesus. Obviously I'm being sarcastic and over-simplistic. But we get the point: Our discipleship journey is made to be lived in community with other followers of Jesus, and usually we group up or are grouped up based on our age or stage of life.

Until this year. Natalie and I are in our early and late thirties, respectively, with two sons, ages 6 and 3. Teresa, our neighbor, is a young empty nester who is seeking to walk with Jesus in community but is unable to worship in a church on Sunday because of work commitments. Cathy, our friend, is an empty nester also who was nervous about being in community with "kids" (like Natalie and I and many in our church) and wondered what the group would think of her and her non-attending husband who doesn't follow Jesus. Hal is a young twenty-something graphic designer who attends our group as well as a couple of others with folks his age. And then there's Ken and Judy, with their amazing daughters, Jessie, Lacey, and Alice, who are ages 22, 17, and 13. So we have two not yet 10, two in their teens, two in their twenties, two in their thirties, three in their forties, and one in her fifties. No one is really coming from the same place as it concerns age, life stage, background, church history, or anything else. And I have done a poor job of leveraging the diversity of our group.

How does the diversity of our group become the strength of our group, particularly when most of us are used to a silo approach of dividing people into groups simply based on age? How can our differences, which feel quite vast to me at times, bring us together and make us more like Jesus? Why have I seen this situation as a place where I am not a great leader rather than as a place where God can show up and teach us about unity in diversity? 

A couple of observations:

• Our greatest identity marker, as Christians, is Christ. "Christ-follower" or "Christian" becomes the noun, and all other identifiers become merely adjectives. So we are no longer old or young, white or any other color, poor or rich, married or unmarried people who also happen to follow Jesus. Rather we are old or young Christians, white or black or Asian or Hispanic Christians, poor or rich Christians, married or unmarried Christians. Only my relationship with God can carry the full weight of my identity; every other marker must bow a knee to Jesus and his saving grace. So Paul wrote in Galatians 3 that in the Church there aren't racial, economic, and social divisions but all of us are in Christ and Christ is in all of us. We are family, despite our outward differences. So despite our ages and life stages, as a community group of Jesus followers, we have the main thing in common. 
• Our greatest differences never have to get the final say. What makes us different will tear us apart or bring us together. (Cue a clip from Remember the Titans, Hoosiers, Bad News Bears, or any other host of sports movies as case in point.) How any small group responds to obstacles says a ton about the value they think the group has for our individual relationship with Jesus. If we fight through the differences for community and to all become more like Jesus, we are saying that it matters. If we get up and sit quietly because we think there's nothing to be gained, then we are saying the group can't teach us anything and that we have nothing to offer such a diverse group of people.
• Further, the things that make us similar to one another can end up making us less like Jesus because we cease to or come up short of connecting around the Gospel and end up connecting around other things...and compared to the surpassing worth of knowing Jesus, those "other" things are always lesser things. Our silo approach may make us more comfortable with each other, seducing us into believing we are becoming disciples in community when we are really just an unchanged or unmoved gathering of friends answering some questions about Jesus or the Bible. 
• How do we leverage our differences? What does the 13 year-old have to offer the soon-to-be 50 year-old? When you and I can accept that the Spirit in us is the same Spirit in that young teenager, then we understand that we all have something to offer and to receive in community. Each of us has a word to be given and to be received, and our various ages and stages give a perspective that others do not have. What is obvious to a 25 year-old may be confounding to this 38 year-old. And what is plain-as-day truth to the 17 year-old may be unclear to the 55 year-old. We need each other's perspectives because we all have blind spots, and God gives us the church (and our little community groups) to lovingly speak to us about what we do not naturally see as we follow Jesus. 

So I've wrestled with how to make our group great. And the question I want to ask as we read the Bible together or pray together or eat caramel-drenched popcorn and catch up on the week together is, "How do you see this?" Or, "Is there something you see or think or feel or believe that I am not seeing here?" These ten diverse perspectives (I'm excluding my kids...they're just watching Transformers Rescue Bots on Netflix and eating sweets mostly -- both subjects they've mastered, by the way), give us ten different angles to see an opportunity, a prayer request, a confusing scripture, or a major -- or minor -- life decision. Ten different eyes looking at a blind spot from ten different sets of life experiences, educational or professional resumes, faith journeys, and more.

So here's to you Alice, Lacey, Jessie, Hal, Natalie, Teresa, Judy, Ken, and Cathy. Thank you for this new season of faith and community. I pray we spur one another on to love and good deeds in Christ, in community. 

Happy Birthday to My Brother

Today is my little brother's birthday. No one actually thinks he's younger -- based on all of his gray hair and sage-like wisdom -- but I am, in fact, 4 years and 2 days older than him and have got a mental scrapbook full of great memories of him. 

I remember "roughhousing" and playing violent games of tackle football meets rugby in our living room as kids. I remember eating fast so I could be sure to get the second helping or last serving of breakfast or dinner. I remember one time when we decided to play a trick on Mom by throwing all of the towels, wash cloths, and hand towels into the bathtub with us. (For the record, this was the dumbest decision we ever made as kids -- no dinner for us and an inordinate amount of work for an already overworked and under-appreciated single mom.) I remember watching in wonder as he could hit a whiffle ball as far as I could with that big red plastic bat in my grandpa's front yard. I remember the first time he beat me in a fight; that was the day I decided we would make much better friends than enemies.

But I don't want to celebrate the past. The guy my brother has become far outshines the guy he was growing up. I figured as a teenager that he'd either be a pro ballplayer or a truck driver. He's long-since flown by that career trajectory. And character trajectory.

Jason and Katie and Hunter are God's grace in our lives. One of a million ways we see and experience God's grace. 

• God has used Jason in my life to remind me that the way things are is not the way they will forever be, that we can laugh in the face of brokenness because we know that pain never gets the last word
• God has used Jason in my life to remind me to see the best in others, hope for the best in others, and to work to bring out the best in others
• God has used Jason in my life to teach me that cheering for others' success and seeing others flourish says a ton about how much I love them; if I am jealous or petty when others do well, then I really was only in love with myself and what another person could do for me. Love is completely uninhibited and is compelled to celebrate when someone we love wins or gets 
• God has used Jason in my life to show me that we have much more to laugh about or share a bottle of Coke or a Krispy Kreme doughnut over than we do to cry about
• God taught me scores of life and faith lessons through the wisdom of a man named Jon Randles, but he's taught me from Jason and Katie what it looks like for that wisdom to be lived out in day to day life
• God has used Jason and Katie to show me that God is the Potter, people are clay, and that the Potter is constantly molding us and shaping us and using experiences, relationships, scripture, and others' wisdom to do so; if we don't feel the touch of the Potter or the discomfort, at times, of his shaping us, then maybe we should examine whether or not his hand is on our lives or if we've moved off the potter's wheel
• God has used Jason to teach me that we need to cry more freely and genuinely than we do, that tears don't show weakness but compassion, love, strength, humility and other characteristics of the heart of God
• God has used Katie, our sister in-law for over 11 years now, to help us see grace and goodness in simple pleasures like the right flavor of Blow Pops, a good blanket, and YouTube videos of others humiliating themselves
• God has used Hunter, my soon-to-be three year-old nephew, to teach me that resilience and a can-do attitude can unhinge any closet door, relocate any pack and play, and do many other challenging tasks when we put our minds to it
• Hunter has also been grace to us with his big hugs and generous tender heart; the world would be better if we were all so unreserved in our affection toward those we love
• God has used Jason and Katie to teach me that character, principle, integrity, love for God and people, and especially hospitality are worth sacrificing for and fighting for; they only ever serve the finest of food when you come over to their house because even the meals they prepare say a ton about who they are and what people and relationships mean to them
• God has used Jason to teach me what Jesus was like in his storytelling. Whether its a lesson from building a counter top to a story about a baseball game, there's always a greater story, the greatest Story, in the stories he tells; I hope I can come to live with eyes so wide open

So here's to my brother Jason on his 34th birthday. My prayer is that the next 366 days are as good to him as he is to others and that God will give him more good moments, laughs, surprises than he has hairs on his back. 

The tragedy of the flooding in South Carolina this weekend affects us all. Each of us is moved by the images and stories whenever something tragic occurs, but it hits home even more when it happens so close to home. The message I was scheduled to preach Sunday -- with no consideration of the weather event that would affect us -- was about the storms of life and how we both prepare for and respond to them. Christ-followers and "nons" are all affected in tragedy, and these moments provide opportunity for the church to rise up. 

In response, I want to say a couple of things about the flooding and how it has affected Origins and will affect Origins.

First, Origins will respond. We are talking with contacts in Columbia as well as with leadership in South Carolina Disaster Relief (this is the Southern Baptist organization that serves the state or abroad in the wake of any natural disaster). They are telling us that until the flood waters recede later this week, they can not assess need. As soon as Matthew and I know what the needs are, we will make a move. Until then, pray. Pray for healing, hope, less damage than expected, and for people to come to faith in Christ in the middle of tragedy and loss. As Origins responds, we will respond in:

• Prayer. Take time this week in your CG to pray specifically for people in our state who are affected and are grieving, disoriented, feeling hopeless, and suffering catastrophic loss. Pray also for those who will serve them. Pray that the Church will rise to the occasion and serve those who are hurting. 
• Give. When we know where to best give financially, Origins will give and we will receive a love offering (hopefully, over and above our givers' regular financial contributions) to help those affected. We ask that you wait to give until we can all give together. Because of Gospel partnership, we have already heard from Jason Shine and our church plants in Edmonton that they want to give financially to Origins to help in the effort.
• Go. Disaster Relief will respond soon, and one of our best men in Origins, Jim Whitworth, will likely deploy to serve in an area of need. We will commission him as one sent on mission when he goes. (This serves as a great reminder to our men and women to go through Disaster Relief training when its offered to be able to go and serve.) We are also talking with some partners about sending small teams of people who aren't trained for Disaster Relief in the days ahead and will keep you posted on that. (Jason Shine may also come and serve alongside us with this effort.)

Second, concerning giving in Origins. Losing a Sunday -- particularly a first Sunday -- puts the church in an interesting financial position. We are praying that your offering that many of you give on the first Sunday of each month will be brought on the second Sunday of this month. You guys are a generous church, and the mission we participate in locally, in our state and nation, and around the world couldn't happen without your regular, generous, joyful, and sacrificial giving. Please don't fail to give this month as we know God is going to call us to sacrifice to help the hurting in addition to our regular ministry expenses.

Third, thank you to the Community Group leaders who spread the word about Origins not meeting yesterday for Sunday Gathering. While most churches in Greenville met for worship, we felt that the South Carolina Emergency Management Division's statewide request to keep people off the road was one that we needed to honor. We were torn. But we trust that in staying home maybe you prayed, spent time in the Word, worshiped, ate a good meal, or took a nice nap -- all of which are acts of worship to Jesus when done with grateful hearts for his grace and love. Please plan to come this Sunday, October 11, to Origins with hearts ready to worship Jesus and pray for our brothers and sisters in our state and around the world.

Finally, know that its a privilege to pastor you that Matthew and I do not take lightly. We love you. We are so grateful to lead a faith family where people seek to love Jesus in all aspects of life each day of every week rather than just for one hour on Sunday morning. This tragedy has reminded me that God is with us in the flood waters (Isaiah 42) and that these moments provide a chance for the body of Christ, the Church, to step up and be Jesus with skin on to a watching world.